Sunday, February 28, 2010

71 Good Things about Unemployment

71.  You snowshoe swiftly down a steep slope without poles and forethought. You plod back up, sweating. Your dog steps on the back of one of your snowshoes. You are no longer going up. You now have evidence there is two feet of snow--in your underwear.  

///  For Good Things numbered 61 through 70, see 70 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 27, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Saturday, February 27, 2010

70 Good Things about Unemployment

70. You read famous quotes and discover hope.
Winston Churchill: Difficulties mastered are opportunities won…I would like to say this is the beginning of the end. But it is not. But I do believe it is the end of the beginning.
John F. Kennedy: Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth.
Groucho Marx: Well, Art it's Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know.

69. You are grateful you have electricity since thousands of area residents are without it. Snow continues to pour from the sky without sun. The neighborly plows scrape by and you wave from the window. You are at home with the fire blazing, streaming dance tunes and not thinking about your former coworkers on the job.

68. You count the number of times the snow plow clears your road. You wish the road crew would plow your drive. The snow is heavy and sticks to the shovel. But, you have plenty of time and nowhere to go. Your car can wait another day, since your driveway is going to take all of this one.

67. No need to wear a watch, unless it gives you the day and date.

66. You keep your hands busy. You may want to crochet a tree jacket.

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future. Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, NY Times, 2/21/2010 http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

/// For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Friday, February 26, 2010

69 Good Things about Unemployment

69. You are grateful you have electricity since thousands of area residents are without it. Snow continues to pour from the sky without sun. The neighborly plows scrape by and you wave from the window. You are at home with the fire blazing, streaming dance tunes and not thinking about your former coworkers on the job.

68. You count the number of times the snow plow clears your road. You wish the road crew would plow your drive. The snow is heavy and sticks to the shovel. But, you have plenty of time and nowhere to go. Your car can wait another day, since your driveway is going to take all of this one.

67. No need to wear a watch, unless it gives you the day and date.

66. You keep your hands busy. You may want to crochet a tree jacket.

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future. Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, NY Times, 2/21/2010 http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Thursday, February 25, 2010

68 Good Things about Unemployment

68. You count the number of times the snow plow clears your road. You wish the road crew  would plow your drive. The snow is heavy and sticks to the shovel. But, you have plenty of time and nowhere to go. Your car can wait another day, since your driveway is going to take all of this one. 

67. No need to wear a watch, unless it gives you the day and date.

66. You keep your hands busy. You may want to crochet a tree jacket.

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future.
Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, NY Times, 2/21/2010 http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010. For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

67 Good Things about Unemployment

67.  No need to wear a wrist watch, unless it gives you the day and date.


66. You keep your hands busy. You may want to crochet a tree jacket.

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future. Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, NYTimes, 2/21/2010 http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.


///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

66 Good Things about Unemployment

66. You keep your hands busy. You may want to crochet a tree jacket.

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future.
Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, yesterday’s NYTimes -http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html
 64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

 
63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

 
62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Monday, February 22, 2010

65 Good Things about Unemployment

65. You get to read optimistic daily forecasts about your future.
Millions of Unemployed Face Years Without Jobs, yesterday’s NYTimes http://www.nytimes.com/2010/02/21/business/economy/21unemployed.html

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

 62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.


///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Sunday, February 21, 2010

64 Good Things about Unemployment

64. You put hot sauce on your cold cereal to boost your spirits before reading the Sunday want ads.

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.


///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Saturday, February 20, 2010

63 Good Things about Unemployment

63. You cook when family come to visit. The oven goes out, so you finally understand these lyrics: Someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it 'Cause it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again, oh no... Yes, Richard Harris sings MacArthur Park…all seven minutes of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amzJDSsC2IA&feature=related 

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Friday, February 19, 2010

62 Good Things about Unemployment

62. You become a member of the unemployed underground. Dues are paid in-kind. Everyone is welcome.

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Thursday, February 18, 2010

61 Good Things about Unemployment

61. You have no excuse not to attend a relative’s memorial service. You drive cross country and charge your gas to one of your new credit cards. You get to see your five-year-old nephew play a critical game in his basketball career.

///  For Good Things numbered 52 through 60, see 60 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 10, 2010.
For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010. \\\

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

60 Good Things about Unemployment

60. You don’t have to go to work on your birthday. No passive-aggressive boss gives you the silent treatment. No conniving colleagues. Instead, I’m taking a trip to Algiers with Charles Boyer and Heddy Lamarr. I’ve got a picnic of bread, cheese, Satsuma mandarins and a grapefruit Izze. It’s my birthday. Take me to the Casbah.

59. You become fascinated with old movies. I’ve watched Cecil B. DeMille’s The Greatest Show on Earth 37 times, while my library fees mount. My hands sweat when Holly, the trapeze artist, duels with The Great Sebastian. Charlton Heston plays another jerk. The only movie I liked him in was Planet of the Apes. Now, that was suspense. I just learned you can get this picture postcard of Charlton Heston’s kiss on E-Bay for $2.95. What a bargain. Hint: My birthday is tomorrow.

58. You get past level 3-5 on a free game of Zuma Deluxe. This is a complicated computer game where a frog spits marbles. If your left-click mouse finger is up to it, you will clear all the marbles before one of them ends up in the gaping mouth of a skull. When you complete a level, a sexy baritone voice exclaims, Zuma! That is the part that gets to me.

57. You get good at Sudoku. And you’re proud of it.

56. You do your taxes as soon as you get your W-2, and kiss your own behind when you learn you are getting a big fat refund. Thanks be to yoga.

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the "weekend-effect."  This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

59 Good Things about Unemployment

59. You become fascinated with old movies. I’ve watched Cecil B. DeMille’s The Greatest Show on Earth 37 times, while my library fees mount. My hands sweat when Holly, the trapeze artist, duels with The Great Sebastian. Charlton Heston plays another jerk. The only movie I liked him in was Planet of the Apes. Now, that was suspense. I just learned you can get this picture postcard of Charlton Heston’s kiss on E-Bay for $2.95. What a bargain. Hint: My birthday is tomorrow.

58. You get past level 3-5 on a free game of Zuma Deluxe. This is a complicated computer game where a frog spits marbles. If your left-click mouse finger is up to it, you will clear all the marbles before one of them ends up in the gapping mouth of a skull. When you complete a level, a sexy baritone voice exclaims, Zuma! That is the part that gets to me.

57. You get good at Sudoku. And you’re proud of it.

56. You do your taxes as soon as you get your W-2, and kiss your own behind when you learn you are getting a big fat refund. Thanks be to yoga.

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the weekend-effect. This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Monday, February 8, 2010

58 Good Things about Unemployment

58. You get past level 3-5 on a free game of Zuma Deluxe. This is a complicated computer game where a frog spits marbles. If your left-click mouse finger is up to it, you will clear all the marbles before one of them ends up in the gapping mouth of a skull. When you complete a level, a sexy baritone voice exclaims, Zuma!  That is the part that gets to me.

57. You get good at Sudoku. And you’re proud of it.

56. You do your taxes as soon as you get your W-2, and kiss your own behind when you learn you are getting a big fat refund. Thanks be to yoga.

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the weekend-effect. This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Sunday, February 7, 2010

57 Good Things about Unemployment

57. You get good at Sudoku. And you’re proud of it.

56. You do your taxes as soon as you get your W-2, and kiss your own behind when you learn you are getting a big fat refund. Thanks be to yoga.

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the weekend-effect. This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Saturday, February 6, 2010

56 Good Things about Unemployment

56. You do your taxes as soon as you get your W-2, and kiss your own behind when you learn you are getting a big fat refund. Thanks be to yoga. 

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the weekend-effect. This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Friday, February 5, 2010

55 Good Things about Unemployment

55. Unfettered-ness. According to another psychological study, most people are happier on days without work because nobody is bugging them. Scientists label it the weekend-effect. This author says for complete well-being, become unemployed. Calling it the “unemployment-effect,” test subjects say they feel better—emotionally and physically—from Monday morning through Sunday night. http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/01/100112085518.htm

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives.
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Thursday, February 4, 2010

54 Good Things about Unemployment

54. You watch a library video, Mr. Moto’s Last Warning, and congratulate Peter Lorre when he throws a stack of dynamite out of his abode as it explodes in the air, escapes from a tied gunnysack sunk in the Mediterranean and prevents a war between Britain and France, while never breaking his glasses.

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.   

 
52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.

/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

53 Good Things about Unemployment

53. As they disconnect your cable, you realize you are already Dancing with the Stars. Just one more of the Desperate Housewives writing her Vampire Diaries. These are the Days of Our Lives. 
Although George Clooney doesn't seem to be referenced here, I think he should be.   

52. You don’t have to bathe regularly.



/// For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.\\\

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

52 Good Things about Unemployment

52. You don't have to bathe regularly.


For Good Thing numbered 51, see 51 Good Things about Unemployment posted February 1, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see 50 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 31, 2010.
For Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see 25 Good Things about Unemployment posted on January 6, 2010.

Monday, February 1, 2010

51 Good Things about Unemployment

51. You can find things of historic value like this big-eyed card from Hallmark’s Heart Warmer’s collection. This find reminds me of when I visited the Precious Moments Park with some good friends. Here is my story about that experience originally published on June 30, 2005, in a now-defunct weekly newspaper called F5.


My cup runneth over at Precious Moments Park

“You really can’t smoke in here?” asked Donnie. “Then, what is this?”

He pointed to an empty concrete flower pot the approximate size of Texas—not Missouri, indeed perfect for a billion or so cigarette butts. The three of us ignored him. Donnie was unconvinced of the humor in our visit to Precious Moments Park in Carthage, Missouri. Michael, Barbara and I had planned this trip a year ago because, of course, life is full of precious moments.

After handing over $46 in admission fees including the senior discount, we hurried to the scheduled show at the Fountain of Angels, where 300 teardrop-eyed statues would spray 100,000 gallons of water in a 10-story blackened building. All this built by Sam Butcher, an evangelist Christian who found Jesus in creating cute figurines and selling them to poor folks earning $15 million a year.

As we found our primo seats in the Fountain Pavilion, thunder clapped and rain roared. The downpour streamed into the building, flowing from a light fixture and pooling on the show room floor. Kids played in the puddles while adults worried they would be electrocuted.

Michael and I were only concerned the show would not go on, as we were told after our ticket purchase that the program would be “powered down” should lighting occur. When the first thunder spoke, we looked at each other and muttered in unison in the midst of the religious crowd, “Oh, shit!” Electrocution was not more important than getting our money’s worth from this planned life event.

The show did go on. The five miles of water pipes and 550 valves were manipulated with electronic precision creating dramatic showers and an occasional 75-foot geyser. Water surged and slowed while recorded hymns climaxed and fell. The 42nd Psalm provided guidance.

As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for you, O God.
--Psalm 42:1

From the depth of life’s greatest trials, the triumph of flowing jets was illustrated with red, yellow, green and purple lights and crescendos of glorious gush from speakers tuned to the Lord.

Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls;
all your waves and breakers have swept over me.
--Psalm 42:7

Out of a heavy mist, the climax was realized. As a projection slowly materialized, we see a draped figure leaving the Precious Moments Chapel. He is walking toward us. He is Jesus Christ. The waterfalls swell as the angels sing glory to God. I lean toward Michael and whisper, “It looks just like him.”

As we exit the Fountain Pavilion with the low-density crowd and view the concrete angels and fishes for the last time, the lights falter. The entire Park is without electricity. The show cannot continue.

We will miss Duke Mason sing Elvis and the gospel. Mason, who is a well-proportioned 46 inches, ushers us out of the Pavilion saying we will have to return another day to see his performance.

I look at our tickets, which boldly state, “All sales final. No refunds.”

Great is the Lord. How can I say thanks for all the things you’ve done.
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If you would like to read Good Things numbered 26 through 50, see the entry entitled, 50 Good Things about Unemployment, posted on January 31, 2010.

If you would like to read Good Things numbered 1 through 25, see the entry entitled, 25 Good Things about Unemployment, posted on January 6, 2010.