249th Good Thing about Unemployment

You are the unemployed representative at Career Day at your kid’s school. You get a free lunch.

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248th Good Thing about Unemployment

You miss the next downsizing, headcount reduction, lay-off, streamlining, furloughing or anti-redundancy maneuver.

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247th Good Thing about Unemployment

You sit in the swamp and act like you are a National Geographic videographer. You zoom in on the vocal sac of a Northern Spring Peeper, a tiny frog with a shrill voice and a built in amplifier. You wait for your academy award nomination.

246th Good Thing about Unemployment

You don’t have to say, “Have a nice day!”

245th Good Thing about Unemployment

You don’t have to buy anything from your co-workers like Girl Scout cookies, candy bars, magazines, Avon products, cookie dough, gift wrap or the boss's body parts after dismemberment.

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244th Good Thing about Unemployment

 You don't worry about getting promoted.

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243rd Good Thing about Unemployment

Technical support means finding a recipe on-line.

242nd Good Thing about Unemployment

You manage unemployment by wandering around (MBWA) with your dogs.

Here are some tips:

1. Appear relaxed as you wander. 
2. Try to spend an equal amount of time with each dog.
3. Talk with them about their passions--perhaps, squirrels, chipmunks and biscuits.
4. Ask for suggestions for improvement and then ignore them.
5. Catch a dog doing something right, like not pooping on the path, and praise him.
6. Remain open and responsive to their concerns.
7. Convey an image of a coach, not a dog catcher.
8. Give them water when you stop wandering on a hot day. On cool days, there is no need for refreshment. 

241st Good Thing about Unemployment

You make your first video: A wood frog croaking in search of love, or at least fertilization.

240th Good Thing about Unemployment

You spend your day watching mating wood frogs in a swamp. You discover the joy of frog fornication.

239th Good Thing about Unemployment

 

No bursts of toxic fragrance in the privy. Some employers think chemical deodorizers are non-monetary incentives in the workplace restroom. Instead, they promote headaches and tinkling in your office trashcan.

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238th Good Thing about Unemployment

You form a strategic partnership. You apply for the jobs and your partner gets you the interviews.  Make sure he shows his teeth, however, and will get mean with mammals other than squirrels.